How to erase any past painful memory of life

Source:pixabay

What you will learn from this article:-

• Bitterness of bad memories.
• Why we should forget bad memories.
• How any event enters in our brain.
• which events are frozen in our minds as memories.
• how we can get rid of bad, painful memories.
• TV technique.
• The effects of the technique.

                                                                     

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Memories can never be forgotten!  Many of you may put your mind to this question. I strongly believe that you can easily get rid of the bitterness of bad memories if you want.

Every time something is happening in our life either good or bad as per our representation to our brain. The events of our lives, from childhood to adulthood, would be skyscraper if sorted out. How many of these either we can remember or take place in the mind! As a percentage it is very low.

Why would we want to forget or try to forget old memories:- We usually want to forget the memories which we feel uncomfortable remembering.  We need to forget the memories that repeatedly rape us, hinder us from achieving our goals, hurt our emotions, take away our focus.

By the way, if I ask where is the presence or existence of any event that was happened in your life, does it have any real existence somewhere in this universe? No, it has no real existence, it exists only in our brain. Once when a person hurt you, you may feel that pain again and again in your mind or you will carry it lifelong. The specific person had hurt you once, then why are you getting wound again and again by carrying that memory?

                                                                           

Let's know how any events enter our brains:- There are basically three ways by which our brains receive what is happening outside. 

• Number One:- By the visual sense, a certain form of what we see enters our brain and takes place as a memory in the form of pictures or videos.
• Number Two:- By the auditory sense, everything we hear, that is, the sound of any event, the music, the conversation, the sound of a car or some loud noise they enter our minds through the ears and take place in memories.
• Number Three:- By feelings,  through our largest sense organ skin, our body's different kinds of sensations always enter in to the brain.  Along with that also other two senses that work are the smell and the test. I did not mention these two separately.  Because the science of Neuro Linguistic Programming combines test, smells and feelings as kinesthetic sense.

For example, if you unknowingly catch fire, it will remain as your memory, just as a certain odor sticks to our noses. Sometimes when we hear the name of some food, water roll down through our tongue.

Let us now know which events are frozen in our minds as memories:- The better the picture or video you make in your mind, the more colorful it will be, the better picture quality will be and the better sound quality will be, means depending on the sharpness or sweetness of audio. The freezing of memory depends more on your feelings, the intensity of the feelings makes the memory come alive.

The events that you are witnessed and you were associated with are tied up in memory. Bad memories involve a lot of emotion so it becomes so vivid.

We enjoyed so many movies, most of those we forgot or we remember a special scene because the video, dialogues or script of the part that our feelings are involved with it, we can relate those to our life.

Repeatedly thinking about old memories creates neural pathways in our brain and these neural pathways become so strong that they automatically come in front of us when we are subject to something else or when we are alone. Some memories have trigger points, such as seeing a certain person or going to a certain place, or a certain smell or sound strangely awakens the memory. That means the person or the place or the smell or the sound is the trigger of a perticular memory.

                                                                             

Let us now know how we can get rid of bad, painful memories:- Memory, we are worried about can be forgotten or make powerless only when your feelings and emotions towards it decrease, if you can disassociate from the event. Any pale, insipid, black-and-white picture does not appeal to our minds. This means that if you can turn your memory to black and white, still photo instead of video, it will lose most of strength. Well, what does it feel like to watch a movie or a TV by mute it? Exactly, you loses interest in it.

Although it is very technical, I will tell you the application of a technique called TV technique. And I am very firmly claiming that there is no easier and better method than this which can work very fast.

Technique:-  Sit quietly and think of any old stressful memory that hurts you and you want to forget, take a good look at everything you see in your mind. Then imagine there is a TV in front of you. There is a glass wall between you and the TV and the painful memory of your life is playing on that TV. The remote control of the TV is in your hand. With that remote you can adjust the color of the image and gradually turn it to black-and-white, mute it to reduce the volume. Pause the video, as if there is a still photo in front of you.  Imagine some drops of rain are falling on it and slowly washing it away. Imagine that the remote control has a button and when pressed it will direct the TV and hit the sun. Press the button, see the TV hit the sun with the speed of a rocket and burn to ashes and from there a beautiful light flash upon you which makes you more beautiful and stronger person.

Source:pixabay

What will happen if you do this technique:- First, imagining TV and glass wall you will become disassociate from the event. Then the picture comes to colour less, blurry and a still photo instead of movie,  disturbing volume will disappear. Gradually it is washed out by rain then totally destroyed by hitting the sun and the event become powerless.

There is words "memories are sweet". Feel the sweetness of the memory, why are you embarrassing yourself by picking up unnecessarily past painful, bad memories! Remember and feel the good memories over and over again then life will become really beautiful. live the life with glory not regret.

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How to strengthen our emotions even in any negative situation

 

What we will learn from this article:

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What kind of mind-set do we need to have our extreme success in life

TABLE OF CONTENT

• Mindset: the psychology of success.
• What is the mindset?
• Growth vs Fixed mindset.
• What kind of mind-set do we need to have our extreme success in life.
• How to develop Growth mindset.

In our daily activities, we are achieving success in some work every day. Sometimes we need to set our minds on achieving this success, but sometimes it comes automatically on the way.

In order to achieve ultimate success in life, we must have the ultimate mindset. If you have already reached to the first stage of success in life, that is, you set goals, the second and most important step is to make the final mental preparation.

                                                                           

Many students or job seekers and many businessmen work restlessly, and try to push themselves in their own field but fail in the final stage. The main reason for this is that all these individuals are not prepared themselves mentally.

We see people with two types of mentality, the type of mentality that most people in this world identify with is a fixed mindset. People with this type of mindset usually leave everything to their own devices, believe that whatever is to happen must be happened, and also believe that 'no matter what we do, the situation will never change'. All these people are guided by the situation and they are not able to handle any challenging situations. All these people pay more attention to criticism and pay attention to the words of others having no own opinions. They usually go one step forward and two steps back in any work. Most of the time negative thoughts pop up in their mind.

There are very few people who have a Growth Mindset. These kinds of people know very well that they can create changes. They are always focused on their goals. They are constantly trying to improve themselves. Everything has potential for them.  Even if they temporarily fail at something, they learn from it. All these individuals are extremely self-confident. They do not worry if immediate results are not forthcoming. They know that today or tomorrow the goal will be achieved. They are very much passionate about their goals. All of these people know that if a person in the world is successful to do anything, then I can learn to do so.

In order to achieve great success, you have to shift from the fixed mindset stage to the growth mindset stage. In order to bring about this invaluable change in yourself, you need to change some of your beliefs and take a few small steps. 

Adopt this belief:-

• If anyone can do, you can also learn or be able to do so.
• There are so many opportunities are there in this universe.
• You are there to serve a great purpose.
• Failure is not for you, every single one is an important lesson.

                                                                         

Now come to the point about what steps to take:-

• Start with the 3 'P's:- That is purpose, passion, and perseverance. Find Out your purpose, what purpose you want to serve for yourself, for your family, relatives, friends, and as well as for this universe. Then move with your passion. You may have multiple passions, take one by one and find out which one is matching with your purpose, and see all the possibilities and their results. After that go for the last 'P' which is perseverance. Hard perseverance will make your path easier. This is such a quality that allows you to continue trying to do something though it is difficult. Make it your habit.

• Enjoy the journey:- Enjoy every step you take to reach your goals. If you need to learn something new, learn it, accept all the challenges, and face them face to face. Being steadfast in the goal, bring flexibility within yourself along the way. Without thinking about how long after success will come, be fully engaged in the process of the journey and take action.

• Do not succumb to any temptation:- Different types of advice will come on the way of your journey and even alluring offers may come. Staying steadfast in one's goal at such a moment is a big challenge and test for oneself. To get rid of temporary pain, to get comfort, if you fall into the trap of greed, your goal will remain elusive.

• Turn insults into your strength without breaking:- No one else knows your purpose, they have little idea about your goals, no one understands your intentions, and they only have a vision of your results. Most people again believe in immediate results, if they do not see the results naturally, they will make awkward comments, and insult you.  Strengthen yourself mentally, and motivate yourself without being disturbed by this.

                                                                           

• Don't lose in the fog of confusion:- There are a number of people, especially those with fixed mindsets, who get lost in the fog of confusion. After walking one way for a while, they take another way. After trying one thing for a while, they get busy with another thing. Sometimes they walk backward. Their problem is very simple, they do not know what their main outcome is and it is not clear what they want. The way to get rid of it is to talk privately with your mind at the beginning of goal setting 'what exactly does it want?' Be specific about your outcome, how you feel about, see about, and the sound likes. Visualize Outcome before Goal Setting, feel that it is in front of you right now.

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Say bye bye to your bad habits and adopt life changing good habits

Table of content:

• What is habit.
• How do habits develop.
• Why can't we give up bad habits.
• How to quit bad habits.
• How to adopt good habits.

Habit is the pattern of our behavior that becomes ingrained in our subconscious mind through the repeated practicing or doing something. 

In other words, habits are such behaviours that do not require our consciousness. For example, when you first learn to drive, you have a complete focus on when to operate the brake pedal, clutch pedal, accelerator pedal. After practicing for a while, you will become Habitual, then you will be pressed on the right paddle automatically at the right time. There is no need to conscious awareness to drive smoothly. 

like driving, we get conditioned by our habits. These habits can work to our utmost detriment or our absolute benifit. 

                                                                             

We become accustomed to anything only when we repeat it over and over again. More than 40 percent of the behaviours we do every day are habitual.  Some of these habits are good and some may be bad. Just as bad habits can turn our lives from heaven to hell, life can be turn into death, in the same way our every day's small good habits bring unprecedented changes in our lives, bring success.

The biggest challenge for us is to get rid of bad habits and build good ones at the same time.

Our minds work mainly on two levels, conscious level and subconscious level. At our subconscious level our habitual pattern is formed which is called Neural pathways in NLP. Whenever we want to develop a new habit such as waking up early in the morning, exercising, working on time, reading books, at that moment our Conscious Mind tries to find out if any such pattern of file is already existing in our Subconscious Mind. As soon as it checked and find the file have no existence then and there we get obstruction, demotivation. For this reason, we failed to build new habits even taking steps.

The best way to get rid of it is to start with the smallest step to the new habit you want to develop.  Suppose you want to exercise for an hour in the morning make up your mind that it's okay, I'll get up tomorrow morning and go out and walk atleast 10-15 steps. It will not be a burden on your subconscious mind, it will take it spontaneously. If you exercise hard or walk a long distance at the beginning of first day your mind will get exhausted, and it will obsract  you for the next day.

                                                                         

There is also another important reason why we cannot give up bad habits. A smoker knows how harmful smoking is to his health, but it is not enough to get rid of this bad habit. Whenever we think of trying to get rid of a bad habit and start to do it, we may be able to stay away from it for the first couple of days or weeks, but then we go back to that old habit again. 

In order to get rid of such bad habits, one has to be aware of his or her own mind in three ways. The first is the detrimental side of it, the second is the improvement in his or her life if  gives up this bad habit, and the third is 'fill in the blanks', what most people have no idea about. If we give up the bad habit, we will have to add some kind of new, healthy and good habit to the empty space that will be created, so that we can become our best self.

Just as no place on the earth can be vacated so our mind. If we cannot consciously fill that void with a good habit, our mind will automatically fill it with one of the relevant habits lying in the unconscious mind. So very consciously, carefully think about what type of new habits you want to adopt by replacing your old habits.

Another best method is to break the trigger point which forces you to go back to the old bad habit. You may use very powerful techniques that is 'Swish pattern'. Close your eyes, find out the behaviour you want to change, see the pictures. Now find out the starting point of the behaviour that trigger you to the bad habit. Put this picture in side.

                                                                           

Now think of the new habit you want to adopt. Check all the internal and external ecology, how your life is changing, improving in all areas, what others people are reacting to you for your new habit. Check if any kind of obstraction are there in your mind or not. Make all pictures bright and colourful. Then see that the new picture you created overlapping on the old picture (habit) and the old picture gradually disappearing. Repeat this process for five more times. This kind of VISUALIZATION help you a lot to replace the bad habit with new good habit.

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Wake up and become your Best Self

TABLE OF CONTENT

• Best Self: top productivity tools you need to succeed.
• The first and Nobel goal. 
• The first step to success.
• Best Self meaning.
• Wake up and become your Best Self.

The first and nobel goal of each of us should be to become our best self. The first step to success is to improve yourself and bring out the best in yourself. Otherwise, even if we succeed, it will not take long for us to get back to  miserable life.

The best version of yourself is to awake the restrained power of your mind, to build your confidence, to be focused, to control your mind completely, to get out of bad habits. Gain ability to withstand against any external forces, ability to face any challenges in life.

I believe in the word "we have all the resources we need". Yes, of course, each of us has that quality, that ability.  We don't just nurture them, we don't try to enhance them. Each of us has in store infinite love, a sense of self-esteem, the ability to win the battle of our own lives. We have all the resources to reach the pinnacle of success.

                                                                           

You can never expect different results without reforming and improving yourself. It is quite impossible to achieve double income with same effort and ability.  To improve your relationship is impossible unless you change yourself.  Your health will never improve if you do not change your old routine, do not have time for exercise.

Each of us has the different way of life.  One's dreams, emotions, skills, ideals, self-esteem, thoughts can never be matched with of other's. So the first step in becoming the best version of oneself is 'finding out who you are and what you want'. I will discuss the rest of the steps later.

Finding out who you are and what you want:- What are your values? What are you most interested in? What do you love to do? What are the things in life that can give you the most joy? Find out the answer of all these questions.

Imagine your otherself is sitting in front of you. Ask him out well all these questions from your otherself. Want to know, what you are interested in doing?  Whose presence gives you the most joy?  What impact do you want to have in this world?  Why can't you do what your soul wants?  What are the obstacles?  Are you afraid of anything? Feel all the answers and accept them honestly.

Free yourself from all the limitations of belief: You are stuck in your own limited believes. You must break your misbelief about your abilities and how much success you can achieve. Limiting beliefs and negative thoughts limits you and the main obstacle to your being the best self.

'I'm pretty good at what I'm doing', get out of this comfort zone.  Faith empowers people, gives them the spirit to work.

                                                                           

Change your bad habits:- One of the most complicated tasks is to give up your bad habits. Because some bad habits become our unconscious pattern, seem to be normal. For example, waking up late. Suppose you wake up every morning at 7 or 8 o'clock or go to bed at 11 o'clock at night. Many will say that 'I can do good work or study at night', it is impossible.  Everything that happens throughout the day tends to haunt our brains, making it very difficult to focus on any given task at the end of the day or at night. We can be very productive in the morning when both the environment and the mind are calm.

                                                                           

Self decipline:- One thing we often hear is 'hard work is the only way to succeed', somany people work hard, are they all successful?  Not at all. Work with discipline and self-control is the strong pillar of success.  Discipline and self-control will make your work much easier and simple.

To maintain self-discipline, you need first to create a healthy routine for every day, and atleast Six Days in a week must be maintain that routine. Never unfollow the specific routine on any excuse. In the routine you must include exercise, study time to gain knowledge and must have time for your entertainment.

Control the fear:- Fear is the most poisonous and disguised enemy. Fear is the biggest obstacle in the way of becoming your best version try to overcome it. In most cases, we have unreasonable fears. We are afraid to take action in the future by enhancing the event of what has happened in the past.

There are so many aspects in our lives where we can improve ourselves a lot, be it of our health, our minds, our wisdom, our communication, our patience, whatever it may be. We are constantly experiencing, our lives are constantly changing.  Then why don't we take that experience, that change in the right direction?

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Symptoms of low self esteem and the way of developing self esteem

Table of content:

1. What is self-esteem.
2. Symptoms of low self-esteem.
3. The reason of low self-esteem.
4. How to develop self-esteem.

Self-esteem is a person's own value. Self-esteem is a measure of self-love, self-confidence, resilience and emotional state. 'Success depends on your self esteem, the size of your self image' many of us have heard the quote. 

                                                                               

Research has shown that low self-esteem causes people suffering from depression, various diseases to take root in the body, and self-confidence to plummet. 

Self-esteem has a huge impact on many important things in our lives, such as success, health, attention, social and family relationships, love, and the workplace. Many people suffer from inferiority complex due to self-esteem and lose faith in themselves.

When we come first into this world no one knows who we are! When we slowly grow up, people start telling us about us, what we hear, what we see all those makes our identity. All these information from outside enter our mind and we keep comparing ourselves with those. Our mind picks up some information from there and creates an Self image. That is how our self-esteem is built.

Symptoms of low self-esteem:- 

• A person with low self-esteem will try to distant himself socially, reduce his interactions with people, gradually try to immerse self in himself, and stop associating with friends and avoid any party.
• Violence will increase in their mind.  Enmity with people will increase.  Make the relationship worse by focusing on small incidents.  Get excited about little things, get into arguments, always look angry.
• They will afraid of submitting their own opinion.  Before giving an opinion, they will think again and again whether the person will feel bad, whether someone will not accept his opinion.  They will be afraid to present themselves in front of others.
• Become indiceceive. Family matters, business, health or love, they will be afraid to decide in any case. Even so, they are refrained from making decisions on very simple, minor matters.
• A person with low self-esteem can not take any kind of compliment whether it is good or bad. They can abuse  anyone who compliments them.
• They are always busy to prove themselves better to others. They do not feel any need to improve themselves.

                                                                             

The reason for low self esteem:- 

1. Our company and environment:- The comparison with other begins when a child develop. Family members, even parents, often compare their child with other children, keep saying that this child is better than you. The child is much more slandered than praised. Negative incidents are highlighted more in the society.All these different types of informations take our minds and form our identity, what we are! Our self-identity, self-dignity are created which influence our self esteem.
2. Troumatic event:- Even a major accident in a person's life, such as abuse or a major injury, can lead to low self-esteem. When all these incidents come to mind again and again, the unknown fear friezes in the mind and makes one feel insecure, panicked. 
3. Failure again and again:- If a person repeatedly fails in certain tasks, his self-esteem will automatically go down.

How to develop self esteem:- 

• Write down your achievements:- Write down everything you have achieved, all that has worked well  in your life so far. At first you may remember one or two, even, sometimes negative thoughts may pop-up and there is nothing to worry about. Write down one or two achievements that come to mind, when you can remember, you will see page after page filling up. This method will increase your self-confidence many times over. Usually low self esteem puts us in a negative state so it becomes almost impossible to think of something positive.  All the negative aspects of life float in front of the eyes in that time. Whenever you start writing your mind will automatically shift towards positive.
• Change your belief:- So far, the negative statements you have received from outside or from one that have been said about you have never been a universal truth. Learn to believe in yourself, learn to love yourself.  Keep doing the things you like. Develop yourself. Emphasize your own mental development, gather knowledge. Believe that you are one of the best creations of the Creator.
• Appreciate all the compliments:- If someone gives you a good compliment, accept it from the heart and thank him. Many will give negative compliments, accept them as learning.  Learn to think in such a way that the negative compliment highlights your specific weakness so that you have to improve in that place.

• Learn to be grateful:- Getting free air of nature, getting light, water, getting free open sky, getting shelter to stay, getting food, getting opportunity to mix with different people, getting opportunity to talk, growing up in the lap of this universe for so long and for these all learn to express gratitude to everyone. You should be grateful for you are still alive.  Many people do not get enough food, shelter or opportunity to live.Don't regret what you didn't get, but prepare yourself to get it. Set the right goal and follow the right path to get there.

                                                                               

Only when self-esteem increases the outside world will respect you, appreciate you, love you.  You will be able to achieve your set goals.

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5 invisible laws of mind how to focus on your goal most of the time

Focus means where your concentration is. Our energy flows wherever our focus is. If your focus is on the goal then your problem will disappear, and if your focus is on the problem then the goal will disappear. 

                                                                         

The very importent thing we need to do to be successful is to stay focused on our goals. In today's world of electronics-gadgets, T.V, social media our minds are easily diverted from one thing to another. Our minds lose their balance in the glare of tempting advertisements.  We can't focus on a specific goal. Thus, one of the bad habits of our human race is to focus more on our environment or our own problems. This results in our goal being lost or blurred in front of us. Most of the time we spend thinking that if once this current problem in our lives is gone I will be successful and my life will change. But infact the exact opposite happens. What we focus on, our mind considers its importancy to us. And the job of the mind is to give a clarity of what we think is important to us, leaving the rest or blurring out in front of us. The narrower our focus, the better the results. 

You can do a test yourself right now. Suppose you are away from your loved one at the moment and unable to see then focus your whole attention on your loved one, think about him or her in your mind.  See, his or her, clear image will appear in front of you even though he or she is behind your eyes. There are many things in front of your eyes but the moment you focus your attention on someone, everything in front of your eyes disappears.

                                                                           

We all know that if we focus we can get very good results, we will succeed. But we do not know how to focus. Parents, or the teachers, said again and again to the children to concentrate or focus on their study. Now if that child asks, okay I'll focus, but how?  Tell me the method. Think, do you have the answer to this simple but very important question of the child's mind?  

Let's try to find the answer to this important question.

• Goal setting:- Set your goal firmly, following the right procedure. If you want you can follow the 'MASTERY' rules. Or if you have already set a goal, meditate on it, make it your constant companion, always remind yourself of your goal. You can use different methods for this, such as doing visualization in the morning, doing affirmation. Make sure you have a set time for your goals in your daily routine, even in the midst of your hundreds of engagements. 

• Remove any 'either or' options of your goal:- Never keep the second option of your goal in life. Suppose someone says 'I will study engineering if I don't get a chance in medical in entrance exam'. That's what we do most of the time and that's why we get distracted.  Your focus is bound to be diverted when you have the second option. 
• Giving an example about this will help you to understand. Suppose you want go to a certain place, the way is unknown to you, you started the journey. Whenever there is a turn in the path, that is, the path splits in two or three, you may get confused, you will think of taking the easy straight path, even you may go astray. If there was only one path towards your goal, there would be no possibility of confusion or forgetting the path. No matter how inaccessible that path was, you would continue on that path. So blow up any such option like 'If it is not, I will do that'.
• Brake your journey to small chunks:- Most people lose their focus in the hope of achieving all the success together. It feels like a burden to push huge goals together in our minds.That is when the thought comes that it's not possible to achieve. So no matter how big the goal is, divide the way to get there into smaller chunks, focus on that. Just as small successes will lead you to goals, your attention and focus will increase a lot.

• Change submodalities of your goal:- I have said before that our minds are more focused on what it think is important. Consciously we all know what is important and what is not, but unconscious mind does not know. Our unconscious mind will feel important only when the sub-modalities of a thing will be very good. This means that the size of the picture in our mind will be bigger,  colorful, life-size, three-dimensional, closer, the sound will be better and there will be feelings.

So build submodalities of your goal in mind so that it becomes most important to your subconscious mind. This means create the image of your goal in your mind large in size, colorful, three-dimensional, add feelings, make it movie, keep it closer, add some music.

• Make your goal interesting to yourself:- Interest in goal will only increase when you visualize the benefits that can bring happiness to your life. There are two things to look at, firstly, how much you will enjoy  in the process of achieving the goal, secondly, how much enjoy you will have in life after achieving the goal, what changes will come, how beautiful life will be. Many people lose focus because they don't make the process enjoyable and funny.

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how to build self confidence | Practical Ways to Improve Your Confidence

 

TABLE OF CONTENT

• Practical Ways to Improve Your Confidence

• How self-confident are you?
• Impact of self-confidence in your life.
• How to improve your self-confidence?

Self confidence is one of our greatest resourceful state of mind. It is the belief about our own abilities, strength, skills. It's the reflection of how much you love yourself, how much you respect yourself, how do you talk to yourself. It is the beliefs about an individual's capabilities to handle the future situations. It allows individuals to have positive and realistic views of themselves and their situation. Self-confidence is directly proportional to the success.

In our society we live in an environment where most of the people even the parents are not trained. As a result, they inadvertently erode our self-confidence, in some cases destroying our self-confidence. Suppose a beloved one in front of you for a while discusses what you have done wrong in life, where you have failed, how much your self-confidence will low! Small pinched comments from lover ones bring down your self-confidence.

                                                                         

95% of people in our society do not believe that they can make a big difference in their life or that they can create something amazing in their life. The whole world will think and act in that way you believe in yourself. Who will believe you if you do not believe in yourself? If you don't believe in yourself the potential will not develop and if the potential does not develop you will not take action. If you do not take action, success will not come. 

Now I am coming to the point how to increase self confidence.

Knowledge:- Knowledge increases your self-confidence to a great extent. It is never possible for you to have a lot of knowledge about everything. But you need to be knowledgeable enough in your relevant field. Your actual experience and knowledge is more important for building your self-confidence than biblical knowledge. Suppose you have a Master-Degree on history or geography, you have gone for a bank job test, you have mere knowledge of finance or banking. What biblical knowledge you have a Master-Degree will be of any use there! Naturally you will lose your confidence before you enter the interview board. 

                                                                             

Check your association:- We associate with people in society whose self-confidence is very low. Interacts with them, unconsciously we absorb their pattern. This causes us to lose our identity and our confidence to go down. If you want to increase confidence, first disassociate yourself from these associations and at the same time find  partners whose confidence level is very high. Those who always cry about their lives, those who always regret the past, those who have no goals in life, confidence is far away, on the contrary, they will pull you down.

Cut off the invisible thick rope of fear that binds you:- Most people lose sight of their self-confidence by imagining events that they think are negative. Again, some people lose their self-confidence due to imaginary fears of failure. Fear, of course, has relevance and irrelevance. Suppose you don't know how to swim but go down to the pond, the fear of drowning is relevant to you. Again you get on stage for a performance, you're afraid of what people will say, if I forget, if I can't perform properly, these all are your irrelevant fears. You already know that self-confidence is a state of our minds. And the state is created by the combination of psychology and physiology. In this kind of condition where you are having fear, you should be positive in your physiology.  That means raise your head, bring a smile on your face, make your chest wide. I claim that your confidence will be very high in a moment. 

                                                                               

Create self confidence through past results:- If you have ever been successful in the past, you can easily increase your self-confidence and succeed again and again. Follow The technic below.

Keep yourself in quiet, comfortable place. Go into the time when you got success, brighten the total event in your mind, feel how confident you were. Feel the fullness of your body posture, feelings, tone of voice, activity at that time. Your breathing pattern, physiology will change automatically when you feel it completely. This way, when you reach your peak state, create an anchor by pressing on any part of the body. 

Break the state and repeat the procedure again. Press in the same place every time. After repeating a few times, break the state and press on that particular place to see how much confidence you are feeling. Then whenever you feel low confidence for any future task, press your anchor and you will see that your confidence will increase a lot.

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The way how to control your mind

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First of all, let me ask you a question, why do you want to control your mind? Surely your mind is disobedient to you, sometimes flying wherever it pleases, going out of your control. Most of the time, negative thoughts run through your mind instead of positive one, sometimes you feel very bored, you can't pay attention to your own work, you forget your important work.

The good news for you is that more than ninety percent of the people of the world have no control over their own minds. And more good news is that about 10% of the people who have been able to control their minds have all had tremendous success in their own field. The most good news is, science says you can have great success if you take control of your mind, your thinking. Bringing this control is not a difficult task.

                                                                             

Our minds are as busy all the time as the ocean.  Here, too, there are always ups and downs in life just like the waves of the ocean, the tide of thought is always flowing. There is not the slightest abnormality in this. Our mind is always preoccupied with one thought or another, sometimes it picks up the old memories and thinks about them, sometimes it forms imaginary images of the future. 

Now the question is, is your mind thinking any realistic thought?  Any constructive thoughts coming to mind?  Are you thinking of something relevant to meet your goals? If the answer of all these questions are 'no', then your mind must be brought under control. Otherwise it will control you, will become destructive, will be more attracted to unrealistic things, will be engaged in irrelevant work.

                                                                             

You can never stop this preoccupation of the mind. But you can only consciously take your thoughts in a positive direction. One important thing we need to understand in this context is that we think in our Conscious Mind and habitual thinking takes place deep in our minds( subconscious mind). And once a thought takes over our subconscious mind, whether it is good or bad, the subconscious mind will produce a reflection in front of us as a result.

                                                                            

Now I am coming to the point how can we take control of our mind.

(1) Meditation:- It is never possible to build a house during an earthquake or a natural disaster. This is possible only when everything calms down and stops. Just like that, you can't think constructively as long as your mind is in turmoil. So at first you have to calm your mind and the only way of it is the meditation. Start meditating, slowly your mind will start calming down, you can't control it at first, a lot of weird thoughts will come and disturb. There is nothing to think about. Keep doing it regularly. Very soon the control of your mind will be in your hands.

(2) Indentify the thoughts disturbing you:- In order to control the mind, you have to be an observer of your own mind. Continue observe, what thoughts are coming and when, what is the source of it? If you observe well, you will see that your mind tells you the good and the bad, whether there is any reality behind your thoughts. It may be that your mind is thinking to warn you about something. You will find the real clue only when you observe from a distance and it will help you to shift from negetive state to positive resourceful state. It will be clearer for you to explain with an example.

Suppose you are in a traffic jam, you will feel annoyed, your mind will become restless and you will get angry, because you are associated with the situation. Now suppose you are observing a traffic jam from a high place. What will be your feelings then?  Then you will say, "Wow, what a wonderful sight. You might even upload pictures on your mobile phone." The point of view is totally changed because you are now a distance observer.

                                                                             

(3) Give the mind good food:- If you don't give your body good, pure food, your chances of getting diarrhea are almost 100%. In the same way always give good food to the mind very consciously i.e. have good thoughts. There is no existence of future or past in this world.  Then why will you pollute your mind by awakening those thoughts. And if you have to think, bring to mind the good events of the past.  Think of a bright future, dream. Look at the good side without looking at the bad side in the background of any event. Talk to yourself in a positive way.  Be grateful, be grateful to this Universe for giving you everything.

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